Elsewhere in your letter you admit that you never thought to pray about your decision or seek God’s will for your future. One reason I wanted to reprint your question is because I hope it will encourage others to pray when they face decisions like this. God is concerned about every detail of our lives, and He knows what is best for us.
Does this mean God has abandoned you, or you ought to seek something else? No, not necessarily; God sometimes guides us even when we’re not aware of it. But it does mean that He wants you to seek His will concerning your future, instead of ignoring Him or assuming that He isn’t interested in you and your situation. God loves you, and my prayer is that you will discover His love in deeper ways by committing your life to Jesus Christ.
Then ask God to help you overcome your loneliness. Don’t look for friends in wrong ways or in wrong places. Instead, ask God to guide you to a church where you can meet others your age and become friends with them—and also grow stronger in your faith.
Remember: as believers we need each other—and some of them may be just as lonely as you are. The Bible says, “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds … encouraging one another” (Hebrews 10:24-25). In the meantime, do your work faithfully, and pray for those with whom you work.