I’m thankful you at least realize what is happening to you, because you’re right: this evil will destroy you if you don’t overcome it. But listen: God doesn’t want this to happen to you, because He loves you and wants to help you break free.
How can God help you? First, He can help you understand yourself, and why you’ve gone down the same road your father tragically followed. I don’t know why you’ve done this, of course—but one reason, I suspect, is because you face some of the same problems he did. And just as he turned to alcohol to try to bury them, so have you.
But God also can help you by giving you a new purpose in life, and a new power to deal with your problems. You see, when we come to Christ and open our hearts and lives to Him, God Himself comes to live within us by His Holy Spirit. We are no longer alone! This is why I urge you to turn to Christ and commit your life to Him. The Bible says, “The Spirit helps us in our weakness” (Romans 8:26).
In addition, God wants to help you by bringing others into your life who can help you. Ask Him to guide you to an organization or counselor who can assist you; your pastor or doctor may have suggestions. Above all, learn to walk with Christ every day through prayer, the Bible, and friendship with other believers. His promise is true: “I am with you always” (Matthew 28:20).